Wednesday, November 25, 2015

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Thanksgiving Time
High School Reunion Season
What do we do when girlfriends are away?
NBA Update
General Sports Talk

Friday, November 6, 2015

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We back.  Just a typical batch of terrible sports analysis, hot takes, and mild racism, all mixed with sudden onset seasonal depression!

Table of Contents:

- Fake Podcast Ads
- Bad NBA Preview
- Khaki Pants Suit looking dudes
- NFL Talks
- How was San Francisco, Sean?
- Quick Halloween Costume Update

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

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We've all seen the memes, the gifs, practiced the dance in front of the mirror like no one was watching, cried when it was over, watched it again, etc.  But, like, let's talk about it.  Seriously, let's square up, look each other in the eye and have a good ol' fashioned blogger to productive human conversation about what really transpired.

About a week has passed since the video came out and changed everything we know about music, dancing, Timberland boots, and turtlenecks.  This has given us all time to decompress and assess what the fuck just happened.  

1) The memes, fam.  The memes.

I'm as millennial as the next inexplicably entitled artisanal cheese lover, but god damn these memes have been too much.  My brain can't process them.  One second Drake's tossing pepperoni's on a DiGiorno and the next he's playing Wii Tennis with Doug the god damn Pug.  I mean, I laughed, but the volume was downright troubling.

2)  Dancing is different now. Forever.

In my mind, after like 3.5 drinks I'm a top 5 bar/wedding reception dancer.  Welp, I don't even know what dancing is anymore because whatever Drake did was kind of transcendent.  Like, you know those crackheads you see on the street just dancing their crack-filled ass off despite their Coby headphones being attached to nothing but air?  It was just like that, but substantially less depressing.  We just needed someone to capture the innocence and jubilance of a person addicted to crack without all of that messy crack involved.  Drake cracked the code.

3)  Where do Timberlands stand now?

As an avid and proud Timberland boot wearer, I don't know what has become of my boots.  Their value is all over the place from a socioeconomic standpoint.  It's nothing new that a rapper is wearing Timbs, but has a rapper ever worn them with a turtleneck and sweatpants, while doing something resembling a molly-fueled cha cha slide?  The answer is fuck no.  As a result, I've been staring my Timbs directly in the laces everyday for like 5 minutes just hoping that they'll one day learn to talk and provide an explanation, or some guidance for that matter.  Do I throw them away?  Do I buy a shit ton of turtlenecks?  Questions everywhere.

4) The song's fire

It's been fire and you know Drake used some sort of complicated algorithm to determine the best time to release the video.  I know that because he brought a fucking lint roller to a playoff basketball game.  Because lint loves nothing more than high stakes basketball, Aubrey.

That's all.  Just had to let the dust settle a bit before I figured out what I needed to say.

(When you drop a fire thinkpiece, but include a meme essentially contradicting everything you just wrote, but also are you going to finish your fries yes those fries?)

Monday, October 12, 2015

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Seriously, where are they?  Remember Tom Chambers?  And....half of Blake Griffin?  Man, those were the days.

Pod Table of Contents:

-Recapping the GoldenPalace.Com Monkey saga
-Friday nights then vs. now
-Ugly babies
-Is having babies trash?
-Field Goals and Knuckleballs
-Chip Kelly is a genius. So is Sam Hinkie
-Dunk Contest
-Racial Dunk Contest - are there any white dunkers?
-Seriously are there any good white dunkers in the NBA?

Thursday, October 1, 2015

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-Had a hiatus
-Football's back and everyone sucks except Brady and Rodgers
-Fantasy Football
-Not sure why, but we got into the golden palace monkey, biology, and animals in general
-Traveling to bolivia
-Girlfriends making us watch the super blood moon

We back!

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

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Never thought I'd utter this sentence, but honestly, this chameleon is everything.  Seriously.  You couldn't be more #unbothered if you tried, fam.  Not since JordanLayingInTheGrassWithTerribleJeansOn.jpeg, have we seen the likes of this:

Eating flies and avoiding predators can wait for 15 minutes when you're playing the leaf banjo and catching some z's on what appears to be a wildly uncomfortable root. 

PS. Yeah.  I forgot I had a blog for like a month.  Whoops.  But, like the consummate blogging professional that I am, I'm just going to pretend it didn't happen and never acknowledge this accidental hiatus ever again.  Hit it, Dave!

Monday, August 24, 2015

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Welcome back.  Work's trash.  This podcast is slightly less trash.  Listen.

Table of Contents:

-Taylor Swift might be worth switching to Apple Music?
-Getting old, teens are scary
-Casual racism
-Bebop and Rocksteady, TMNT
-Godzilla was bad
-Jared from Subway
-Deez Nuts
-Eat a lobster roll from McDonalds
-We're going to Kansas to Catfish everybody?

Thursday, August 13, 2015

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My god, what a hero.  If that's not a "On my way to steal your girl" face, I don't really know what is. On second thought, this might be a "ZOMG I just climbed 700 feet to the top of this crane without opposable thumbs and I've got to take a shit" face, but who's really counting here.

Got to give this guy some credit.  He sought out a challenge, put himself in position to succeed, and won.  Once you disregard the fact that "winning" means high altitude dumpage and start to appreciate this little critter for his willpower and determination, life suddenly starts to make sense.  And, to be honest, if you replace pooping with peeing, I'm right on board with this plan.  Don't lie, fellas. There was nothing more satisfying than peeing from a distance.  Personally, I used to stand outside of the bathroom door and see if I could pee in the toilet, so I completely see where this raccoon was coming from.  

No matter how much we talk about technological and social advancements, it's evident that society isn't fully ready for next-level extreme excrement.  SMH.

Thursday, August 6, 2015

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Introducing the GOOD ENOUGH Podcast.  We finally got a name.  It's not bad, it's not great.  It's good enough.  There we go.

Table of Contents:

Boston is Bougie

AC Juice falling from the sky

Philly, what happened?

Did we invent a new sport?

Summer kinda sucks.  Admit it, it does.

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

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Oh.  This is wonderful.  Not like snails are gross or anything.  Let's just make them 10x their normal size and have them live in the trees in our neighborhood.  :-)

Fuuuuuuuuuuuck all of this, yo.  This really might be the last straw for Florida.  As a state, as a structural entity, as an ensemble of atoms - I want Florida out of here.  First you had that dude eat another dude because he was on Florida manufactured drugs and now this.  No three-strike system when it comes to tree-dwelling snails that can poop on me and give me meningitis.  No siree.

My first reaction to seeing a SIGN telling me that there are GIANT LAND SNAILS in the area would be very similar to this:

Not even going to get into that second picture up top.  Just going to smooth avoid it and act like I never uploaded it.  Denial is the best strategy here.

It's time: