Wednesday, December 31, 2014

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In case you missed it, 2014 was a dumpster fire. Super trash.

We lost TWO planes.  But, you know,  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.  Donald Sterling brought racism back to the NBA because, my god, did we miss it.  No one thought "Redskins" was offensive.  Ebola happened, then we all Googled it, and got scared about pooping blood.  Oh, can't forget those crazy ISIS bastards.  Horrible.  And then, without fail, racism happened again.  All of sudden, police officers started killing black people like hotcakes.  Hotcakes, I say!

Iggy Azalea and Macklemore are also the songbirds of rap.  Drake got smacked by Diddy and also did this:

On the flip side we got Bobby Shmurda, who almost single-handedly saved 2014 with the Shmoney Dance:


But then we realized "Hot N***a" was the highest charting murder/gun storage confession track of all time and we lost our hero.

Cheers to another great year of random blog hiatuses, overt racism/sexism/everything-ism, violence and disaster.  All in all, it was hot basura.  Luckily we get another one tomorrow.  Let's try not to screw up 2015, guys.  Plus I promise to blog more.

Friday, December 12, 2014

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Good lord, man.  These ambiguous blobs of nitrate-free "treats" have set an almost unattainable level of whiteness.  Even Whole Foods would scoff at this like, "Oh wow, we..we just can't sell these."

But you know what?  These are a great way to set the bar EXTREMELY low for children.  Basically perfect for when you want them to have a childhood, but you secretly don't love them/care about their happiness.

Very curious to know what a gingerbread woman even looks like.  Boobs or nah?  Just trying to ask the important questions out here.

Thursday, December 4, 2014

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Mike Brown

Mike Brown's family this past Thanksgiving without their baby

Clear, vivid, and disturbing image of Eric Garner getting choked to death by the NYPD

Eric Garner's last words.

(Let's take a break from the dick jokes, cute animals, and strange, yet hilarious, banter.  The world is turning into a terrifying place right before my eyes.)

Look, I don't hate the police.  I was raised to revere them - to love them.  My father is a retired law enforcement official and still holds the spot as the best man that I know.  Although life was not great for him, he made sure that he raised a pragmatic and intelligent son.  He kept me safe, but not sheltered.  He made sure to teach me right from wrong, but, most importantly, he pulled back the curtain.  

For years I wondered why my father always told me to keep my wallet in my front right pocket (I'm right-handed).  At first I thought it was just a comfort thing, but then I slowly realized it was a precautionary measure.  While attending high school in a predominantly white area, I asked many of my friends where they kept their wallets. Most said they kept theirs in back because that's the only way they've seen it done - a respectable answer, but also a privileged answer.  Their fathers didn't have to worry about their kids getting shot when they were reaching for their wallet because the cop thought it was a gun like my father did.  They also didn't have to worry about walking alone on the street late at night.  Or being deemed "suspicious" for wearing certain clothes.  For awhile, I was naive.  I thought that if "I stayed out of trouble" and "kept a low profile", everything would be alright.  
Every day is a dice roll for every individual that walks the planet.  But, for me and others that look like me in the United States, the die are a bit more weighted.  After the recent events that have taken place in Ferguson and NYC, it has become abundantly clear that my life's value is much lower than I thought it was.  Again, naivety.  Like many others, I thought "WE MADE IT" when President Obama was elected.  I thought racism (overt and subtle) was on the way out.  It's not.  It's just reformulated and re-purposed.  Even though I've stayed out of trouble and kept a low profile, I can be dead tomorrow.

I'm not a lawyer and I'm not going to pretend to be (same goes for you, fake Facebook political analysts - newsflash, you all look like idiots), but lives were lost and repercussions were not administered.  A family was without their son and children were without their father this past Thanksgiving.  Trayvon Martin's parents had to spend another year filling that void in their hearts.  Legal system aside, that is some sad shit.  Imagine your dad, brother, friend not being around this Thanksgiving/Christmas and every holiday thereafter.  It's heartbreaking.  And I know that could have been and still could be me.  I wear hoodies, I listen to rap music out of the car, and I'd attempt to break up a fight if I saw one on the street (barring the situation).  But preconceived notions, man.  I'm a SERIOUS threat because I'm a reasonably stout, young black male and there is no way that I can shake that.

Please, everyone that reads this, take note of what I'm saying here.  Don't hit me back with "All Lives Matter"  (that's like running into a random funeral and yelling that you've experienced loss, too) or comment any stupidity on this post because I won't be having it.  Just read and absorb perspective from the other side of the lawn.  Ask questions.  Reach out to people and say "hey man, how are you?"  Shit like that goes a long way.  I implore you that this is not the time to argue.  Lives were lost, families were destroyed and cultures have been rattled.  It's bigger than all of us now.  

Thanks for reading.