Thursday, December 3, 2009

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I Need A Checklist For This Bad Boy

If I had the resources, I would do a live webcam eating of this sandwich for you all to see. Ok, you got me, I have the resources, but I don't want you guys to watch what would happen as I attempted to eat a triple baconator. I once ate the regular baconator and missed Tuesday-Thursday of that week. Shit is no laughing matter.

If I were to do this, I would need a few things:

1) A toilet--I don't want to explain.

2) Defibrillator--Just to play with, I think these things are sweet. Pfft, me have a heart attack? I'm in awesome shape.

3) 32ozs of Fruitopia--nothing tops off saturated fat like high fructose corn syrup.

4) My Mother--If I cry, it's all good.

5) The Wendy's equivalent of the Burger King crown--If i'm going to do this shit, I will need some sort of memorabilia to showboat to my children before my untimely heart related death in the year 2022.

The coolest form of suicide this way of the Mississippi, ladies and gentleman, the Triple Baconator.

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