Umm, So Billions Of Cicadas Are About To Wreak Havoc All Over The East Coast

Oh lawd, this is some nightmarish information.  According to Science, we're fucked.  Just billions and billions of giant, flying cockroaches have been buried in the ground since I was 8 and have been biding their time to wreak havoc.

1996 was when these things made the executive decision to ruin all of our lives in 2013.  Can't knock their logic.  

I mean they only really missed:

That's basically it.  Probably the best 17 year span that a bunch of killer-insects could miss.