Thursday, January 3, 2013

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Was Anyone Else Terrified Of The California Raisins?

First off, who the FUCK thought it was a good idea to model a Blues band AND a cartoon show out of raisins? I will never come close to understanding how this possibly happened. The fact that a meeting definitely took place to determine this is mind boggling to me. But more importantly, how scary are these things?

Granted, my pride and what little remaining swag I had is pretty much gone, but I'm not afraid to admit how much these raisins startled me. Like, why do they have to look like pained, old black men? And that asshole with the sunglasses on just bothered me immensely. Dude didn't have an instrument or a mic, just his glasses and the occasional mohawk like that was good enough to be a member of a band. Terrible example for the kids.

Moral of the story: too many lumps, grooves, wrinkles and realistic expressions for me to come close to supporting this franchise. Fuck grapes.

PS. If you don't know what these things are, I swear I'm not old and all of this post is redacted.