Wednesday, May 15, 2013

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Guys, Should I Adopt My Girlfriend's New Dog? His Name's Tito If That Helps


My girlfriend's family recently acquired a new member and after like 2 months, they are indifferent to him.  I don't get why.  He's cute, right?  He's obviously a pug and clearly has the requisite hate-my-life pug face that all of us find incredibly adorable.  Well, here's the problem.  He's old, he's blind and his eyes get green gunk balls in them.  All of that goes hand and hand really, but I think these "deficiencies" make him the perfect dog for me.  I work, I blog, but I love and I love hard.  What better dog to dote all of my love on than a tiny pug that doesn't require much attention, can't see anything and generally wants to do nothing all day?

Here's Tito in a nutshell:
                                                     
Prancin' around like a fuckin' boss for 3 1/2 minutes before getting impossibly exhausted.

Too exhausted to make it to his bed.  Just plopped on the ground doing his best burrito impression.

An hour later, he made it to bed and looks all sorts of shitfaced.

But he keeps it classy and licks his entire face before bed.

Mission accomplished.

And that's it.  That's me having "responsibility."  If I can make sure this dog has 4-5 minutes of exercise a day and can successfully guide his blind ass to bed, I'm a good owner.  Do I have to agree to this?  I think I do.

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  1. Kyle said... May 15, 2013 at 9:57 AM

    I bet Tito does or eventually will begin to smell bad. I vote Nay. You want a blue chip dog, like a newly minted 2013 Labrador. Only adopt him if there is no other refuge for him.

  2. Dub Jeezy said... May 16, 2013 at 9:48 AM

    confirmed. he does smell.

    part of me wants a blue chip dog and a dumpy pup to balance myself off, ya know? i need the strong, friendly, athletic protector, but i also need someone that I can laugh at. tito can fit the role of court jester perfectly.

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