Wednesday, February 6, 2013

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Timeout. THIS Is What Moles Look Like?!

I was about to dive into a news story about how moles can smell music or some shit and then got completely sidetracked when I saw what a mole actually looks like.

No, really, what in the FUCK is this about:

I have a lot to say about this. First off, this is what something looks like after it blasts itself in the face with a shotgun. Also, I'm not completely sure if that's a nose, mouth, vagina, or booty hole. When you can't tell if something is a nose or an asshole, there is something very wrong with you anatomically. Plus you have really weird hands, bro.

I'm so disappointed in:

I've lead my entire life to believe that this is roughly what moles looked like. Crafty oval-headed creatures that were just out to ruin crops. Occasionally 1 or 2 would get their hands on a hardhat and hilarity would ensue. You know, playful, lighthearted stuff. Nope, lies. Motherfucking Milton Bradley duped me hard.

PS. How messed up was the idea of whack-a-mole? "Oh shit, that mole is trying to attain natural light. Let's crush it's skull with a hammer!"

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