Friday, October 25, 2013

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Two Takeaways From Don Yelton's Interview on The Daily Show

Loads of people are talking about Don Yelton, who was recently forced to resign as a North Carolina county's GOP chair (Buncombe County, if you care). And since we're, you know, lazy and expect the government and everyone else to give us everything, we're forcing our way onto that bandwagon. We would have posted this yesterday, but we were busy working! Or standing in line for our welfare check.

So turbo racism and blatant partisanism aside (yes, it's a real word), these are the key takeaways:

1) Tiny glasses

Anyone with spectacles that small should be up on the housetop (click, click, click), struggling and wheezing his way out of your chimney after leaving mad loot under your decorated pine captive.

Now we know. Be very afraid of middle-aged white men in tiny glasses because none of them are Santa and they have the complete opposite of presents for you.

2) Bohonka

Speaking of real words, this is a vernacular term for buttocks, apparently in the North Carolina region and vicinity. I live in California. I thought bohonka was what someone would name an illegal pet panda. We're not ignorant here, we know about badonkadonks. Or maybe I'm the ignorant one? Enlighten me, people of other regions, on the bohonka.

I am here and now officially declaring what's left of 2013, The Year of the Bohonka.

Here is the full video for anyone who got to this point not knowing what I'm talking about.

When asked about the video and subsequent backlash, Yelton said, "The comments that were made, that I said, I stand behind them. I believe them." You bet your bohonka.

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