Tuesday, June 25, 2013

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Smoking Alcohol Is The New Hotness

Hate it or love it, this hipster is partying pretty hard 

Call me old fashioned, but I kinda enjoy the drinking aspect of alcohol.  Can't really picture myself at the bar huffing Bud Light without looking like a total asshole.  Actually drinking a drink is half the appeal next to getting drunk.  You can't dump a vapor shot of Jim Beam over your shoulder like a normal washed-up drinker, you actually have to absorb that shit or else the environment is affected.  Hell, that shot can seep into the atmosphere and intoxicate a baby strolling by outside.  Can't have involuntary babyslaughter on your record all because you were too much of a bitch to swallow/inhale/? a cloud of whiskey.  

My official stance is that I'm against smoking alcohol until they create an over-the-shoulder dumping mechanism for the occasions when someone orders whiskey shots that I don't want.  Until then, I'll just let this bro sort through his Busch Heavies and Maker's Mark as he contemplates indie music and wooden bicycles or some shit.

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