Wednesday, August 7, 2013

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Just A Super Dead Shark Chillin' Hard On The New York Subway


So I guess Smeesh was right?

Bet no one questioned it either.  People probably looked down, thought "Oh, that's most definitely a dead shark." and picked right back up where they left off in Candy Crush.  That's what I love most about grizzled public transportation users.  They've had their souls crushed by a diminishing view of civilization and just keep it moving.

Props to this shark too.  This dude is dead as hell.  It died like one of those actors that try to over-dramatize a death scene.  Fins slumped to the side and belly-up so you can see the pronounced "I'm dead" face in full display- overall a great product.

PS. What the fuck is up with Shark Week?  It's starting to become the measuring stick of people I do and do not want to hang out with.  Here's the formula: 

1)  Great Whites, lots of them.  They haven't changed since the prehistoric era - you're watching the same shit every year.

2)  Surfers that lost a limb to a shark bite, but won't let it stop them from surfing again.  Sidenote: it's 2013 and a black person has still never been bitten by a shark.  A definite "pro" in the swimming stereotype.

3)  Nerds talk about shark bites.

4)  Make up some shit about a prehistoric shark (e.g. Megalodon) 

That's it.  You're a lemming and a sheep if this is something that you look forward to every year.

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