Monday, August 19, 2013

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Smeesh's Monday Musings: Redefining the Arrogant Asshole Game

Well I didn't get up early enough to post this in the morning and to those of you who would complain I say fuck off. This is my first weekday spent outside of my cube since what feels like 'Nam. You're lucky I'm even writing at all today. But since I know you're not gonna spend the day searching the internet for your own nonsensically entertaining bullshit, here we go.

Without further ado here are Smeesh’s Monday Musings, your Monday morning time-killer, good/bad/ugly style:

The Good – Apparently prostitutes accept payment in change now. According to
this Huff Post article, some guy in Greenwood County, South Carolina banged a hooker and paid her with a $10 roll of quarters. Obviously not a great look for Larry Collum getting caught, but this is a major victory for guys everywhere.
Honestly, I have no clue how I was late to the punch on this one. Total Pontiac Game Changing Moment. Do chicks honestly expect us to pay top dollar for drinks at overpriced bars when this option is on the table? “$50 dollars on drinks for a chance to awkwardly dry hump later because you wanna pretend you have morals? No thanks, babe, I’ll just grab the change from under my couch cushions and have some sex.”

The Bad -  

A-Rod is finally embracing his role as the comic book supervillain of the MLB and I absolutely love it. Shit. Triple H ain't got shit on A-Rod. The fist pump. The pitcher stare down. The pause on home plate to goad the fans. Just redefining the arrogant asshole game.

The Ugly – As a Philly guy I feel obligated to mention Charlie Manuel’s firing. Look despite the dentures gif, Chollie was probably the least embarrassing part of the Phillies’ awful 2013 season. The man wins us a World Series and 4 division championships and Ruben Amaro Junior sees fit to kick him to the curb, not even letting him wait until the offseason to start dusting off his resumé. I don’t want to bore you and a million people have done it already so I won’t even get into the numerous reasons why Manuel’s firing is horseshit. Just wanted to pay respects to the man. Good luck Charlie, the fans will miss you.

Follow me @SmeeshWMD


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