Wednesday, February 16, 2011

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Question: Do Sports Illustrated Models Exist In Real Life?

I'm being completely legitimate here. Been alive 23 years and haven't seen any real person that looked like this or anyone in that magazine.

Lived in New York and Boston, frequented some of the scummiest bars (wait) and haven't seen one of these minxes out in the wild. Or on the street. Ok, maybe it's the scummy bars I go to literally all the time. Seriously, whenever I think I'm at a nice place, it's revealed either through someone else or through harsh realization that it is at heart, a scummy bar. Maybe it's because the girl population balances out to a smooth 4.6 out of 10, but I'm beginning to lose faith that these people actually exist. Sure my overall Youtube bandwidth is suffering because I just had to view all videos associated with the 2011 magazine shoot, but that's not seeing them for reals.

Which is why I'm going to embark on my CGI theory, which isn't really a theory, it's just that I think these fake angels are just CGI. A gross waste of money, but a founded thought. I'm a fairly good looking dude, especially by blogging standards and I find it legitimately unbelievable that I haven't seen a perfect 12 with my own eyes.

Until that day comes, I'm going to be stubborn as fuck and mark them as avatars, Pixar film protagonists, and video game heroines.

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