Monday, July 30, 2012

Tipping is a delicate operation. You want to be reasonable, tip as much or more than everyone you're with and have the ability to drop the hammer if you get shitty service.
Lots of people are afraid that they'll seem cheap if they don't tip their waiter the young-professional-subscribed 19-22%, but if someone doesn't bring out my chocolate milk in a reasonable amount of time and/or ignores me for minutes on end, they'll know about it via a wack tip. It builds character. Or I'm a dick. I don't really care either way. I just know for a fact that I would never leave motherfuckin' "Pi" as a tip in any scenario.
I know a bunch of dweebs will see this picture and have a nerdgasm, but real talk, you can't show this to your boss and receive Pi as payment. Dude will just be like, "He wrote a squiggly line and somehow ended up with $20. No tip." That's just cold-blooded as hell. While I do completely believe in the ol' make-your-total-add-up-to-a-whole-number move, this just wasn't right. This is borderline fight worthy.
Am I the only one that likes a nice whole number to look at on Sunday when I check my bank account? No matter how shitfaced I am, my multiple bar tabs always look clean as hell. Zeroes, no change, and a complete lack of recognition of what I paid for.
Don't be a nerd and pay $3.14 like a regular person.
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