Serial Masturbator Tyree Carter Banned From Every Library In The World

Getting banned from a library is like getting banned from a Blockbuster Video these days, so life ain't too bad for Mr. Carter.  If he can dodge that year in prison and the $11,000 fine this a net-zero transaction in my opinion.

I understand that you're homeless Tyree, but in 2013 you can manufacture a better way to get your rocks off than works of literature.  The quote didn't read, "Officers found him with his head stuck in a Playboy", the report said you were reading a god damn book, man.  If it wasn't one of those Nora Roberts pseudo-erotica books they sell in CVS that look crazy alluring, I would lose the little respect that I had left for you.

Also stop looking so much like him:

(shout to Kenan for turning that career around)

But hey, you got banned from every library on the PLANET.  Church.