Tuesday, November 5, 2013

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Bananas Are Pretty Much Ruined For Everyone Now

Thanks to a bunch of bananas stuffed with spiders, we're all on high alert.

A woman in London opened a banana to find millions of Brazilian wandering spiders crawling out of it. I'm exaggerating. There were probably more like thousands. Or a dozen, whatever. But when poisonous spiders are swarming, one is enough to keep me off bananas for good.

Bananas! One of the best, most portable fruits in the world. I love bananas so much I bought one of these in 2007. Now I have to worry about spiders. That's bananas.

Just so you know, the Brazilian wandering spider is the most "toxic" according to the Guinness Book of World Records. And they're also known as BANANA spiders.

Now that I've dropped this bummer bomb on everyone, I'm going to tuck my pant legs into my socks. For the rest of my life.

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