Wednesday, August 12, 2009

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How Does One Acquire A Penguin?

Baby Penguin Walking


If you haven't noticed, I have finally learned to embed videos into this formerly shitty blog. Now I get to put the most ballinest, potentially irrelevant videos into this thing and raise blog interest up for the masses that are reading....

So, penguins are awesome. Nothing to say further about that. While I am lacking the important (some say necessary) knowledge to take care of a penguin, I would deem myself a competent owner. I'll get a big ass air conditioner to alleviate any "ooo i'm cold" issues and I will even play father to their eggs. Cut an individual holder out of an egg carton and leave Jr. in the fridge until he's just about ready to be birthed. Saves time for my penguin, me, and the baby because he's not risking life and limb chillin' on mom's feet.

Also, if I were to make a dirty south song that featured poor lyrics, egregious screams, and a catchy dance, it would most assuredly feature something close to a "Crankin' Dat Penguin" type of dance. It would obviously...wait what? Are you kidding me? It fucking already exists?! God Dammit.


Of course my idea would be better, not steal Soulja Boy's shit...and feature Lil Jon and Pitbull.

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