Monday, July 26, 2010

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Ron Artest. Terrible At Dodgeball

Jesus Ron, clean it up out there. You throw a dying duck out there and hide behind Ronnie-The-Fat-IT-Guy-That-Plays-Volleyball-On-Wednesdays-Exclusively-For-Exercise-Purposes. I'm appalled by this. Not appalled by that chick in red shorts..just you Ron, just you.

To be honest, I think dodgeball might be sneaky best sport to win a girl's heart. Sure there's baseball, basketball, and football, but don't sleep on dodgeball. Talk about a sport where you can step up and be the hero. Ron, take some notes brother.

Go in there, make a joke towards the chick in the red shorts, then explain how you're rich as shit, have an NBA championship, and may or may not have a dog for a wife (scratch that last one). Allow everyone on your team to get knocked out except for her. It shouldn't be a problem because you're a fucking pro-athlete. Proceed to take out all 17 of those nerds on the other side and make sure she's protected. Give her a wink after you win and she jumps in your arms.

Bingo, Bango, Bongo.

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