Wednesday, October 10, 2012

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Is There Anything In This World Worse Than An Unaccounted For Spider?

No lie, it's DEFCON 5 right now. I'm pretty sure my TV is destroyed, my bed is in shambles and there are clothes everywhere. I even contemplated sticking my head in the oven, because no one can live like this. A small-medium sized spider crawled across the floor and I don't know where it is.

This is basically "call out sick" worthy if I can't find and brutally murder this crafty fucking arachnid by sunrise. Plus I'm just convinced it's watching me from a nook somewhere, spider-giggling and calling me a bitch under it's breath. Well yes, in this exact situation, I am a bitch. And honestly, what's really good with that "You eat 8 spiders a year" Snapple fact? Did Myth Busters get to the bottom of that, because they are not prioritizing themselves correctly if they didn't.

Yes, I agree I shouldn't have used nearly an entire container of Scrubbing Bubbles to kill a rogue spider, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Shit's probably a black widow or one of those red-flag spiders they show on the Discovery Channel.

Oh well, I'm just going to throw my "Aw Shit" face on...
...and stay up the entire night watching Netflix, waiting for the inevitable.

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  1. Anonymous said... October 12, 2012 at 12:17 PM

    you have to move out within the hour if you can't find it

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