Friday, September 30, 2011

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So I Guess People Look Down Upon Napping In The Bathroom

What's wrong with sleeping on the toilet? I do it at least twice a day, 10 times a week and there's nothing wrong with me. Sure I may be a little creepier than the next guy, but that's not a result of anything that happens in the bathroom.

So I ask everyone that sits on an ivory tower/high horse this, what do you do when you feel really tired at your desk? Coffee? You can only drink so much before you freak out, crash, and make a hasty trip to the bathroom because coffee is a diuretic. Do you walk around? Walking is legitimately one of the worst things in the world. For all I know, this may be better than sleeping on a toilet, but I'm too cool to find out. The only solution is bathroom napping. Sure people may suspect that you constantly suffer from IBS, but there's no better place where American freedoms are recognized then a work bathroom stall.

Today I took like a 7 hour lunch and went a little HAM on some beer and sandwiches. Needless to say, I was dragging elephant ass when I got back in. The average person would have "toughed it out" or got an XL Iced Coffee, but not me. I marched right into the ever so spacious handicapped stall, leaned back, set a phone alarm for 20 minutes, adjusted my arm on the wheelchair rail and nodded off like that baby laying on the pillow in front of the toilet. Full proof. My only enemy during nap sessions is myself. I have only two horror stories. 1) Started snoring and the echo of my snore woke me up. Something like that can make you reflect how you're living your life. 2) Caught a vicious leg cramp and was hovering above the ground with my ass cheeks out. Not a good look.

But aside from snore attacks and the lack of oxygen in my leg muscles, this is probably the best idea I've ever had.

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  1. Anonymous said... September 30, 2011 at 4:06 PM

    this is amazing

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