1)
-Rock'n Jock MTV Basketball is borderline a figment of my imagination at this point. I have vague flashes of Gary Payton switching teams at half-time in '96 and Macaulay Culkin hitting a 30 point shot that went through 4 rims. Absolutely no game clock, confused celebs, ashamed athletes, and Pam Anderson. I miss you Rock'n Jock.
2)
Kelly Rowland looking busted as all hell, the two other girls still existing/remaining on the grid, and Beyonce clearly looking like she's going to defect 6 years later? This must be late-90s Destiny's Child. I can almost smell the track inconsistencies of "Bills, Bills, Bills" and "Independent Woman" through my computer.
3)
Shout-out to anyone that gave Prodigy and Compuserve a try. I was way too much of a bitch/visionary to let my Mom come close to installing anything other than AOL. AOL Keyword: NBA, Boobs, Breasts, Nude, Cartoons, Hot Nudes is essentially my entire 90s internet experience.
4)
I spent the equivalent of 4 million little kid dollars on this fucking game. Strictly used Homer and Bart because this was the most sexist game ever. Homer was beating henchmen with his fists, Bart had the skateboard, and Lisa and Marge had a fucking jump rope and a vacuum cleaner. Not a good look hitting a dude in the wrist in a jump rope when you're trying to find Maggie.
5)
Pretty sure this is what Soulja Boy meant when he said, "Hopped up out the bedddddd, turn my swag on." Clarissa was like if Lady Gaga and Nicki Minaj weren't assholes. Coming out with weird shit, but killing the presentation from every angle. Had dudes risking life and limp to ladder their way up to her window (did Sam ever get it in?). Not many girls you do that for. Nah-nah-nuh-nuh-nahhhh
Props to the 90s. Everyone from my generation is going to destroy the world.
-pics from Buzzfeed.
Thanks KM.
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