Monday, May 2, 2011

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Burning Question: Are Uncle Ben & Aunt Jemima Related?

As the card-carrying black member of WMD, I'm going to take the liberty to dive into this one. I'm either an idiot who has missed out on the clearly obvious "yes" answer to the question or I'm the only one brave enough to learn the truth.

First off, Uncle Ben and Aunt Jemima are artifacts of slavery and racism that just sort of slipped through the cracks. People are so down with syrup and rice pilaf that they completely overlook that there is a glaring issue with these characters. Hispanic people dealt with it too with the Taco Bell dog. Spitting "yo quiero Taco Bell" without a care in the world. And obviously the Monopoly guy was Jewish--that's just a given. Racial mascots, dare I say, kind of make the world go round.

But yeah, I know I didn't attempt to answer the question because I'm just going to go with the obvious yes like I should have from the get go. It's too blatantly obvious. A woman that saw a calling in molasses and pancakes while a man formed a powerful connection with starches and wheat. Beautiful and erotic at the same time. Not really erotic, but this couple definitely made bank which is always sexy. Crushing shit like the Oprah and Jay-Z of their industries.

Plus we all know who was really running things...cough..the plantation owner..cough...

5 Reactions to this post

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  1. Anonymous said... May 14, 2013 at 11:55 AM

    i just had this exact thought earlier today. i think they were married

  2. E said... May 17, 2013 at 3:44 PM

    Actually, Uncle Pennybags aka Mr. Monopoly is a caricature of J.P. Morgan, who was Episcopalian. Also, the QUAKER Oats guy is a Quaker (obviously) and Quakers have always been vehemently opposed to slavery. Get your facts straight or learn how to Google.

  3. Dub Jeezy said... May 17, 2013 at 4:07 PM

    E - I wrote this 2 years ago, so I'll respond like 2 years ago Dub would:

    1) stop being a nerd and internet researching the Monopoly guy. go out and experience sunlight

    2) the sarcastic tone of "that's just a given" completely missed you it seems.

    3) yeah, in general Quakers were opposed to slavery, but some definitely owned slaves. Quaker oat guy 100% has an "I own slaves" smirk going and it's astonishing that you can't see that.

    Of course I know how to Google, I'm kind of the internet. Duh.

  4. Dub Jeezy said... May 17, 2013 at 4:08 PM

    "kind of the internet" is obviously how the cool and progressive kids say "king of the internet" these days.

  5. Anonymous said... September 29, 2022 at 9:27 AM

    Shoulda used the Colonel to represent the plantation owner

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