Monday, May 23, 2011

// //

Completely Down To Buy The Baby That Survived A 8-Story Fall Down A Trash Chute

The news reports weren't really giving me anything today. Saw a story about the entire police force in England getting called to deal with a stuffed animal on a golf course. I won't even comment on that because that's just England being England. Then I saw this story about a super baby that fell down 8 flights of stairs and wasn't fazed. A light bulb obviously went on my head telling me I must scrap up some funds together and buy this baby immediately.

Sure you can take the easy route and be like, "I'm definitely trying to buy a LeBron James baby or a Usain Bolt offspring", but I'm thinking outside the box here. Just bypassing the athlete route and going straight for the super-hero. Seriously, my cat fell off the fridge once and it was rattled for like 2 weeks. This baby fell through an ENTIRE hi-rise apartment complex. Kid probably broke some infrastructure--cracking tiles and shit. You best believe I will be Youtube'in the shit out of all his efforts. "Father tosses baby off shit", "Baby breaks out of cinderblock cage to get his food--father videotapes", "Manny Pacquiao claims he sees God after getting smacked by this baby." The possibilities are literally endless.

Endless until he inevitably kills me in the midst of a one-double-cheeseburger-left-on-the-table scenario.

0 Reactions to this post

Add Comment

Post a Comment