Tuesday, March 23, 2010

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How It Would Go Over If I Said Some Of The Lyrics Of "Say Aah" To A Girl At The Bar

Listening to "Say Aah" today, I blacked out a little bit and pretended if I was in the situation of one, Trey Songz. Instead of it being him, it was little ol' me at the bar saying the lyrics to a woman. This is how it would go....

Me: Shawty, you the baddest, and to meet you is an honor (lil mama?).

Bar Girl: Excuse me? What did you just say to me? Did you say "lil mama" under your breath in question form?

Me: Err...umm.....I got a table waitin', what you think about a convo?

Bar Girl: You don't have a table. This bar doesn't even have a VIP section. What are you trying to pull here? You have to answer at least one of my questions before we can even begin having a "convo."

Me: (Shit, shit, shit) And if you like it baby we can take it to the condo? ::in a wildly uncomfortable tone::

Bar Girl: Smacks me.

Me: And if you like the condo..

Bar Girl: You are really starting to freak me out right now...You keep mumbling stuff under your breathe and you're just a weird person. I'm not interested!!

Me grimacing: We can move the party to the bedroom? I'ma beat your body like a congo....

Bar Girl: I'm going to tell the bouncer to kick you out of here and then I am going to call the police. You've accosted me, propositioned me, and overall treated me like a piece of meat, all the while rhyming as you do it like it's a game. I'm disgusted and hope that you get help you sick depraved bastard!!

Moral of the story: every hit song's lyrics are lies. Lies that lead you down a path to sexual harassment and prison.

Stray away from such tracks and leave it to the professionals people.

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