Monday, October 24, 2011

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Can Someone Make Sure "Party Rock" Never Gets Into The House Tonight, Or Any Night?

This song is making a mockery of the phrase, "shelf-life." As a surveyor of everyday societal actions, I specialize in knowing when shit is on the way out.

From a young age I was able to decipher when it was time to get in and get out of fads. Ever since I made the fatal flaw of missing out on the primetime of Pogs, I made it my goal to never let such a thing happen again. Still can't tell you what a Slammer is. Anyhow, I cruised through Yo-Yos, made a mockery of Tamagotchis, and entered/exited the Pokemon phase like a boss. Now it appears we are fully entrenched in the "Party Rock Anthem" era and it's fucking awful now. Look, the shuffle was a good time--we all sweat a little too much and elbowed a girl in the face once or twice. But this ornament show was simply too much on so many levels.

Ornaments suck. There's no defending that one. Tons of work with no real reward. This video is the absolute pinnacle of ornament decoration and it is looks like hell.

Someone call ADT Security systems and set up a fool-proof device to make sure the authorities are called if "Party Rock" even sniffs a 300 foot radius of my home.

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  1. Anonymous said... October 25, 2011 at 7:58 AM

    the truest of truths

  2. Anonymous said... October 25, 2011 at 8:11 AM

    I think the decorators missed the concept of "Halloween"--it's trying to "pretend" to be scary, not be a dark memory from some drunken party a few weekends ago. That's next-level scary; too much psychology for trick-or-treating 20-somethings...

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