Monday, October 10, 2011

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The Creator Of This Should Win A Nobel Prize

Actually scratch that. You can't fucking take a nap on that pillow without accidentally blasting the volume or turning on that A/V channel that no one can figure out how to change. It becomes completely useless as a remote and immediately becomes an unnecessarily large obstruction that no one wants to use at the risk of looking like an asshole.

WHY does it still have a VCR button?! I'm almost at the point where I have no recollection of what a VCR is anymore. Vague memories of the acronym VHS pop in my head, but it's real hazy. As a remote aficionado, erroneous buttons are red flags for me. Space eaters that end up creating issues for my fingers and can lead to eventual carpo tunnel. Plus ya'll know a brotha needs an easily accessible "Go Back" button. Those crazy nights when no one's home and something really "intriguing" comes on Skinemax, you want to be pretty dextrous when you hear that door unexpectedly swing open. I give this a remote a C- overall, but an A fucking plus for effort. Can't knock an item for a man's man.

VCRs were literally the least practical creation ever created by modern man. Went through like 3 "Lion King" tapes because the black ribbon in the back would get fucking corrupted or something nonsensical.