Thursday, October 20, 2011

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Girls Ask Dub: "What Should I Be For Halloween?"



I hope this picture does a good job at answering that question.

There's a magic formula to every successful girl costume. Show 65% of the skin on your body and you can literally be whatever the fuck you want. Check this pic right here. I would pounce this girl and serve 5-10 up in a correctional facility while completely neglecting the fact that she's dressed as a electric anime rat. She followed the formula and had herself a successful costume that was worthy enough to get put on my website without her permission. I'm fairly certain you can go to any bar for Halloween in the clothes you wore to work out. Add in a few strategic rips, sprinkle some glitter all over shit, and kablam, you're in the top 5 for the bar's "$1000 Sexiest Costume" giveaway.

You ladies have it easy. As guys, we have to be witty, topical, creative, all while maintaining the ability to drink and have real conversations. I typed "Sexy Girl Halloween Costumes" into Google, and once I sifted past all of the porn, I stumbled upon: 1) Sexy Tootsie Roll, 2) Sexy French Fries and literally 3) Sexy Shit (seriously, click that link. It's a girl dressed as shit..and she's kinda pulling it off). That just goes to show that you guys have the cheat code to Halloween. Follow the 65% formula and even, Hitler, Bin Laden, or a Klansman are probably in play.

Meanwhile I'm putting blood, sweat, and fucking tears into finding a decent establishment that sells suspenders for my costume.


4 Reactions to this post

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  1. Emma said... October 21, 2011 at 5:10 PM

    I TOLD YOU WHERE TO FIND THEM!! You're just lazy!

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