Tuesday, November 15, 2011

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It Was Just A Matter Of Time Before PETA Rained Fire On The Mario Raccoon Costume

^Mario just pleased with himself, farting in the raccoon suit.

Anyone remember Super Mario Brothers 3? Easily a top-5 game of all time. Let's dig into the origin of this costume for a second.

I remember being a dominant Mario player in my youth. Sometimes I needed help from my dad, but for the most part I could hold my own out there. Then the leaf came. For all intents and purposes, things didn't make much sense in Mario games. I'll let the mushroom slide because the game's setting is "Mushroom Kingdom." Fireflower lets me shoot fireballs? That kind of makes sense. Now a leaf that turns you into raccoon..that one doesn't seem right. Not even on one level. Someone in the programming room clearly fucked up and it was brushed under the rug. Last time I was home, I was reminiscing with my dad about Mario 3 and I brought up the leaf. He responded with, "That was the first moment in your life that I genuinely had no answer for you. I couldn't even make one up I was so flustered."

So PETA knock yourself out. Sue the pants off of Nintendo and only settle if they give you a 150 page dissertation on why a fucking leaf put you inside the skin of a raccoon. It's gross, bizarre and as Papa would say, "flustering."

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  1. Anonymous said... November 16, 2011 at 7:57 AM

    mario's definitely taking a dump in that suit

  2. Anonymous said... November 16, 2011 at 3:09 PM

    just saw barstool wrote about this...your post is better

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