Wednesday, November 23, 2011

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Why Are Bus Terminals Filled With Ugly People?

I don't know why, but every year I decide to take the Greyhound home on Thanksgiving. Every time I'm like, "Wow, that sucked. Definitely taking Amtrak next year" and always just forget. It's mind-boggling because in just about every other life situation, I would pay premium price to avoid any sort of contact with ugly people.

The bus terminal is a haven for borderline homeless people, confused college kids, loud/intrusive foreigners, and people that consistently fuck up their travel plans. I fit into the last one. There is also a greater subset that about 95% of the people in the terminal fall into, and that is UGLY as all hell. It's hard to establish any footing when everyone around you is less than up to par in the looks department. You'd be surprised how well you can go about your day when you're surrounded by average to above average looking people all of the time. Shit becomes problematic when you start hitting the extremes of the attractiveness scale. I'm damn near paralyzed when a ridiculously hot girl is within 20 feet of me. I basically treat her like the T-Rex in Jurassic Park. On the other side, when you're around ugly people you're just grossed out to the point that you lose the will to do anything. I threw away my Big Mac halfway through eating it when I watched an obese, unfortunately gross couple making out 3 spots ahead of me in line. Wasn't worth throwing up for a couple of MonStars.

I'm not trying to toot my own horn, but I was essentially the Statue of David out there. People staring, giving me a "What is HE doing here?" type of look. It was flattering, but also depressing. I'm no prize piece (I'm a 10 by blogger standards), but amongst that crew I felt like the rat king. Nothing special, but a lot better than all the rest.

Thanksgiving break posts are going to be SUPER weird.

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