Thursday, June 2, 2011

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I Have The Same Exact Conversation With My FedEx Guy Every Single Morning

Me: Hey, hows it going?

FedEx guy: Good. What's your last name again?

Me: Crawford (reach to sign device)

FedEx guy: Haaave a good one.

Me: You too

Just look at that god damn smile. I've been seeing through that shit for 2 1/2 years now. Everyday I see the same FedEx guy and recite the same seven words listed above.  Should I feel bad here for not mixing it up? Sometimes I'll throw in a what's going on but that obviously won't get him talking. But each time we meet I can't help but think that he still doesn't remember my last name. Come on bro. Write it down or something - we go way back.

Granted it's the most minimal acquaintanceship in the history of mankind it's still there. I know our repetitive awkward encounter marks just one of hundreds for him through his daily routine. I'll have to catch him off guard one day and ask what his favorite color is. Maybe take a shot in the dark and wish him a happy birthday. Perhaps I'll inquire about the weather for starters.

Some part of me wants to dive right into deep conversation. Sort of like when Ben Affleck pours is heart out to Matt Damon in Good Will Hunting. "You know what the best part of my day is? The best part of my day is walking out front to sign for packages...thinking that maybe this will be the day you tell me a story about your kids or something." I could also take the Robin Williams route and try to break down that shield of a smile by repeating "it's not your fault." Unfortunately until then it's just going through the motions.

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  1. CW said... June 3, 2011 at 8:02 AM

    He's probably wondering why the same kid has been signing for packages for 2.5 years. No one new has been hired since you? Or are you hanging on to that responsibility for job security purposes?

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